Difficult

This is the word that describes me in alot of things in my life. My home life is ‘difficult’, my asthma is ‘difficult’, everything is ‘difficult’ it seems.

Nothing is ever plain sailing, but why should it be, when things go right we appreciate them all the more.

I went to enroll for my A Levels yesterday, I have finally passed my GCSE Maths at the right grade (this was an important requirement for my new college) tooks ages and it was complicated at times due to my age, my asthma and having already got some qualifications but I am finally on the course to study Chemistry, Human Biology and Sociology and a Keyskills in ICT.

So while I am pleased with that, if I am honest I am dreading it too. I am always tired either due to my asthma or not having enough sleep because of having insomnia (which actually started cos of my silly asthma). I haven’t been in proper full time education for at least 18 months, I have got used to having a day with no real structure, now I have to go to college 5 days a week, I feel shattered at the thought. I have all these expectations of myself to push my myself to do the best I can but I worry my body will get in the way of that like it has before.
I am determined to pass my A Levels at the grades I need, but I know it isn’t going to be easy.

I went to see my new asthma consultant on Thursday (27/08), I definitely can’t have Xolair because my IgE is way too high, I knew this but I am kind of gutted because theoretically had my IgE not been so high it could have worked brilliantly for me. My consultant thinks I have a range of severe food allergies, one in particular is an allergy to nuts so I have been sent for a blood test to check for allergy to a variety of nuts. I will not be surprised if they all come back positive because I was surprised when I was tested for Latex Allergy and it came back positive despite never having noticed a majorly significant reaction. I am going to see my consultant again in 2 weeks.

I went to see The Time Traveller’s Wife last Friday (21/08), I enjoyed it but thought the plot was a bit difficult to follow at times and I oops ended up not concentrating, I think I will read the book now.

Hmm I can’t think of anything else to write, I will try to update soon.

Simi x

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